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One of the biggest taboos in the human condition is death. None of us wants to confront it, even though we know it exists and will eventually arrive. In the last moments of life, when the body closes down and consciousness welcomes quiet, many people (far more than we realize) have a tendency to repeat the same sentences because we live life as if it weren’t right on our heels with every step we take. These are four short lines that, according to Dr. Siddhartha Mukherjee, are uttered on deathbeds with disturbing regularity. They are neither admissions nor shouts of terror.
These insights were made by Mukherjee, a well-known author and oncologist, at a commencement address at the University of Pennsylvania. However, he spoke not as a scientist but rather as someone who has seen that moment of life’s farewell numerous times (not his own, of course). His message was forceful and unambiguous: we should all conduct our lives so that we don’t have to say those final words. or that we say them quietly, at any rate.
The words that sum up an entire life
Even though it’s not always said on time, the first one is a universal expression. Why is saying “I love you” so difficult for us?
In their last moments, a lot of patients feel compelled to reiterate their affection for their loved ones, according to Mukherjee. It’s common to regret not saying it more frequently. How much emotion is concealed by this straightforward sentence? The most essential thing we leave behind when we go is human connection.
Do you forgive me?
Another term that comes up frequently. Many people seek for forgiveness as they say farewell for faults they’ve carried around for years. According to Mukherjee, this last act of humility ought to cause us to consider how many times we have put off saying sorry because we were proud. How many times have we caused harm to someone and then just waited for it to go away? Perhaps now is the moment to begin speaking it while we are still living.
I forgive you
By relieving others of the burden of bitterness, some people pass away. After years of suffering, it is a surprising comfort to both the speaker and the listener. When death is imminent, there is no time for chains. Forgiveness is letting go, not forgetting.
Tell me you love me
Indeed, as the light is about to go out forever in the final moments of life, many people want to hear something they may have heard very infrequently during their lives: that they are loved and always will be loved by those who are traveling with them.
Thank you
People who know they’re leaving almost always want to thank you. To life itself, to their doctors, to their families. A serene smile typically accompanies this last sentence. Saying “thank you” is more than just a way to end a conversation; it’s a moment of complete awareness of all that has happened, both good and terrible.
Let s not wait until the end
Mukherjee didn’t use sentimentality when discussing these sentences. He took this action to convey a message to those of us who have time left. Live intentionally, express our emotions, and take care of unresolved issues. These sentences are all compass points. It’s not about resentment or assigning blame, because at the time, you can’t recall who caused the automobile accident or whether you got into a heated argument over money. You keep in mind the things you didn’t say or do because, at the end of the day, that’s what we take with us.
The author behind the message
When it comes to Pinterest quotes, Siddhartha Mukherjee is hardly an expert. As a physician, he has witnessed hundreds of patients’ last moments. In terms of scientific outreach, his book The Song of the Cell was already a landmark. However, this message’s weight—and what a weight it carries—comes from his personal experience.
Live well to die in peace
Perhaps we have no influence over how we pass away. However, we have a choice in how we live. More often, say “I love you.” Express regret without having to wait years. Even if it’s difficult, forgive. And always say “thank you.” Waiting merely postpones the inevitable—love and forgiveness, death and change. Treat life with seriousness; love and forgiveness have been reduced to empty platitudes that people have come to deride.
Life doesn’t give notice, so make the most of it, love until it hurts, feel, live, laugh, forgive and ask for forgiveness, don’t let pride stop you, and most importantly, enjoy the people around you. Don’t wait until your last moments to beg for pardon.
